To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.
Oscar Wilde
We are at Generosity Habit 4. We’ve already discussed Physical Health, Mindfulness, and Connecting With Others. And as important as all of those are, so is connecting with YOU!
Who you are is beautiful. What you want is important. What you can accomplish is astounding. But sometimes the hardest part is knowing who you are and what you really want. Sometimes your fear about being judged, rejected, laughed at, different persuades you to hide parts of who you are, to be appear to be tougher than you really are, to not care about things you care about, to deny parts of your personality.
Connecting with Yourself is about knowing and honoring ALL of who you are- your good, your bad, your ugly, your sad, your insecure, your vulnerable, your angry, your joy. All of you.
When you are generous with yourself, you…
- Give yourself a break: Have you noticed that you are your own worst critic? I know it’s true for me. But would you be as hard on your children or your best friend as you are on yourself? Treat yourself like you treat your best treasures.
- Give yourself credit: Sure, you’re not perfect. But you’re not supposed to be! You’re a work in progress, so give yourself a little pat on the back for the good stuff you’re already doing and the progress you’ve already made.
- Give yourself permission: Take chances and risks. Be wrong. Be silly. Be vulnerable. Try something new. Play. Laugh. Cry. Give yourself permission to act like a kid, to act like a grownup, to act like an entrepreneur or an artist or anything else that catches your fancy. Give yourself permission to be all of who you are.
- Give yourself time: Giving to others requires a strong foundation from which to give. Give yourself time to do things that restore your spiritual and physical health.
- Give yourself the gift of receiving: In the same way other people need you, you need other people. In the same way, you feel great when you give to others, others feel great when they give to you. Give others the gift of giving to you, and give yourself the gift of receiving from others.
Connecting with yourself is a fundamental habit, because if you don’t accept you, and I mean all of you: the good, the bad, the ugly, the beautiful; if you can’t let all of your light shine, because you are afraid of being judged; if you can’t love all of yourself, giving to other will be exhausting and unfulfilling.
Try This…
For a small boost to your self-esteem, try this exercise:
- On a scale from 1 to 10, one feeling absolutely worthless and 10 being totally confident that you are awesome, how much self-esteem do you have?
- List 5 things you’re good at.
- List 5 things aspects of your personality that you like.
- List 5 things you’ve accomplished in the past.
Leave a comment about your experience with connecting with yourself. Do have good self-esteem? Are there parts of yourself you don’t like, don’t accept?